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Dr. Melissa Carver > Motivation  > Why Authenticity is the Key to Success

Why Authenticity is the Key to Success

We are born with a purpose to fulfill; our soul has a personality and a plan with our time here on earth. This is our authentic self—what the soul radiates and enjoys. More often than not our parents, society, teachers, etc., have other plans in mind for us. We become more and more programmed as time rolls by, forgetting who our authentic self is—or worse, afraid to express it.

Authenticity is the key to attracting what you want in life. It’s a magnet that will draw forth the rightpeople, experiences, and success that is just for you.

Soul vs. Ego

The soul is the most authentic form of you. When it is fighting to lead you to an experience or person, do you listen? Your ego may jump in to tell you that it’s dumb, or others will think you are crazy. Why? Because the ego only cares about being liked. That’s its number one job! Ego wants to survive, be boosted up, and fit in wherever it goes. The ego loves the standards set by society because they are an easy set of guidelines it can follow to ensure you (it) get noticed with positive feedback.

Soul on the other hand has no fear of who likes it and who doesn’t. The soul has the only truth to personal power, happiness, and authentic love. The soul can feel when you love from a surface level—a love that will never go beyond the car you drive, your bank account, or your social standing. Your soul, the intuitive side of you, will lead you to authentic love if you allow it to have power over ego.

Who will you give the power to today? It’s always your choice.

Facing Judgment

Whether it is for acceptance, inclusion, or simply pleasing those you love, judgment will come. Sometimes those around you will judge because they feel a particular aspect you are now showing the world is sudden. Even though you have really just been hiding it or not allowing yourself to explore, they are not aware of that. Allow them an adjusting period along with conversation about why you have chosen to be more authentic.

This can be a difficult decision, especially with those you love. If you have acclimated your life to speaking, acting, and reacting a particular way due to thinking that is what they wanted, remind yourself that you could be wrong. What if they don’t feel that way themselves? What if they have been programmed to also follow such rules, traditions, and thought processes? You could be their door to express their authenticity as well.

Unfortunately, depending upon each situation and topic, there is also the chance that someone will excuse themselves from your life. Perhaps they too are afraid of being judged if they continue to socialize in your presence. You may have heard of, seen, or experienced firsthand this type of scenario. For example, people may choose to remove themselves from someone’s life when that someone makes his/her views, thoughts, or personal actions publicly known in such topics as sexual preferences, religion, politics, or various activism stances, especially when they are contradictory to their own. The choice must be yours, but ask yourself: if you’re not being truthful to receive love, how much are you receiving anyway? There are many more people out there who will love the authentic you at your deepest most intimate self.

Authenticity Is the Deepest Form of Self-Love

People often ask how someone with a large bank account could ever be unhappy or how could someone with so many who love them not love themselves? These questions are easily answered: They were not authentic.

Authenticity doesn’t just provide outward success and happiness, it provides the deepest form of self-love: to not only know who you are but also share it freely with the world, allowing the universe to align the rest. This is one of the greatest compliments and expressions of gratitude you could ever show to the life force within. It’s the light and life’s purpose you came here for in the first place.

4 Ways to Practice Authenticity

Try the following simple tips to help you get started.

1. Go with how you feel.

Whether you are having a one-on-one conversation or are in a group setting, if your body feels uncomfortable surrounding a conversation, now’s the time. You may have several thoughts of doubt. Remind yourself this is pre-judgment. Your brain mixed with fear is now creating a “worst-case scenario.” This is the ego mentioned above. The ego doesn’t want you to risk its persona. Push through these emotions to release the words of your opinion, your feelings, and how the particular topic affects you on a personal basis.

If you are not quite sure how you think specifically, you just know it feels off inside of you, speak on that. It is OK to say, “I’m not sure exactly how I feel but I don’t all the way agree either.”

2. Release fear of vulnerability.

Many of us have placed walls of protection around us. Of course, you don’t want your feelings hurt and allowing someone to know too much gives them ammo … or so you may tell yourself. If another person is out to harm you, he/she will find ways to attempt this act with or without your authenticity. Release these shackles with small steps. Allow those closest to you to experience and learn more about the deeper aspects you may be holding back. Confidence will grow over time; before you know it, pure strangers will feel like longtime friends as you become more comfortable with who you are.

3. Nothing is set in stone.

As you evolve, learn, and expand your consciousness, your opinions will also expand. During this process, you may feel uncomfortable speaking about your new knowledge and beliefs. What if the people who were there before don’t understand or accept the new you? They still have the same traditions and thoughts you previously had.

Take into consideration all of the greatness that has happened around you and on our planet in general due to growth, research, and change. You are allowed to evolve! With personal evolution comes new thinking. It may change multiple times over your lifetime. Look for those who are excited to share in your growth as well as share a similar mission. Allow those close to you a transition period. Their first reaction is just confusion and possibly fear of losing your companionship. Reassure them your growth has nothing to do with your connection with them.

4. Accepting yourself as a leader.

Being authentic comes with leadership. This is because so many people still hold back from allowing the world to see who they truly are. Your voice and comfortability (that will expand) will inspire others who feel the same. You will begin to notice strangers telling you their deepest feelings and personal kept secrets. From small topics to extensive. This is because your energy will shift, authenticity can be felt and it makes others feel comfortable around you. Accept this role and you will spread much joy and positivity into the world just by being you!

Practice small forms of authenticity if this is a hard topic for you. Talk to a friend or life coach to have that one person you can speak openly with about what you want to bring forward, the difficulties that come along with that and to celebrate the victories. Celebration is an amazing way to keep you going! When you allow that one thought to seep through your lips and others accepted it as your truth, buy yourself a treat, blast the radio, and sing. You are beautiful just the way you are!

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